Welfare Queen

I'm not mad that Sarah Palin is a bulldog with lipstick.  I'm not mad that she is a Joe 6-pack American, because she isn't; I could kill her in either iteration of a 6-pack contest, be it beer or be it sit-ups.  I'm not mad that Sarah Palin is a conservative, for the simple reason that Sarah Palin is NOT a conservative.

If Alaska were a caricature bandied about by the right wing, it would not be one of flinty self-reliance and individualism, a mosaic of men who wrap splints around their broken bones and women who scoff at the notion of welfare cheese.

If Alaska were appraised for what it really is, it would be seen as a Socialist paradise populated by welfare queens.  Let's think about what Alaska really is.

It's not a contiguous or defensible part of this country.  It's a step-child.  It's the ultimate example example of American arrogance and disquisition.  Hey, lets put an enormous and perpetually vulnerable and militarily indefensible American "state" right next to Russia!

I don't think Alaska and Hawaii should be states.  I'm old-school.  I grew up with 3-channel black and white TV, rotary phones, cloth diapers, and baths in the sink.  Countries must be contiguous, in geography as well as culture and political priority.

What is my relationship with Alaska?  Alaska is a place I send money to.  I don't have the money to move out of what most people would call a ghetto, but I have sent money to Alaska.  

There are states in this dyspeptic federal system who pay in.  And there are those who pay out.  Now, considering what Republicans say about fiscal responsibility and local prerogative, who do you suppose it is that is fleeced by the Feds?  

Well, it just so happens that the states that pay more to the federal government than they get back are the states that vote for Democrats.  So, the states that bitch about how much the federal government taxes them are actually the states that are receiving money they never earned from the very government they condemn.

Sarah Palin plays the role of a self-reliant capitalist ass-kicker.  But where does most of Alaska's money come from?  The money that allowed her to "cut taxes"?

Alaska's money came from two places: the oil companies and the federal government.  First, for the oil companies.  

This "conservative" ran a regime under which every resident of Alaska got a check from the oil companies.  Wow.  Socialism, anyone?  Is this not what some say Chavez  should be killed for?  Dispersing private profits to the people?  To paraphrase from Richard Nixon in 1948, Palin's pink right down to her underwear!

Secondly, the federal government.  I am not a huge fan of the federal government, and one of the sources of my dyspepsia is states like Alaska.  Alaska gets more money from the federal government than any other state.  

So what does that mean?  That means that Alaska is our welfare queen.  It's that state that we send money to and that never gives back.

Okay maybe we need to prop up some of our neighbors.  But here's what I will not abide:  I will not abide a welfare queen bitching to me about wasting money.  

Sarah Palin complains about the federal government.  If it wasn't for the federal government, Sarah Palin's "state" would've been swallowed by Canada or Russia.  If it wasn't for the federal government, Sarah Palin's "state" would have no running water, roads, hospitals, or any of the other things that she cites as her heritage.

The issue here is hypocrisy, and how casually it is tolerated.   This woman comes down from Siberia and tells us that we're interfering in her state.  I'd be glad to cease said interference.  I'd be glad to stop spending my money to Alaska.  

However you spin it, I've be coerced into sending money to Alaska and Sarah Palin has the ovaries to go onto national TV and act like she'd have been better off without it.  Well, I'd have been better off without giving it to her. 

Sarah Palin runs a welfare state masquerading as Lord of the Flies.  This is the masquerade that must be unmasked.  This woman collects money from us and scolds us for interfering.  Sorry for intruding onto your liberty by building roads.