If there is one problem with American governance today, it is this: American governance does
not exist. The task of American governance has, slowly but surely over the course of sixty years, morphed from “make sure Alabama has schools” to “make sure Seoul has anti-aircraft missiles”. This is not to say that Seoul should not have anti-aircraft missiles; it is simply to say that Alabama used to be closer to Washington, D.C. than Seoul.
I am a republican, miniscule fucking “r”. By republican, I mean believer in the republic. I am disposed of the increasingly unpopular delusion that the American government is supposed to govern America. I pride myself in not having absurdly naïve expectations of our government. I don’t expect my government to mediate the politics of Baghdad, especially when considering the fact that Iraqis simply refuse to speak American; I do, however, expect my government to do run of the mill things such as…oh….preventing tens of millions of anonymous and illegal immigrants from flooding our nation. Or, perhaps, rebuilding New Orleans after it suffered more physical damage than Hiroshima.
I don’t want a president that can bring peace to Iraq. A president that could bring peace to Iraq would be like a president that could eradicate lust from the hearts of men or beauty from the face of children; these are impossible tasks. I want a president that can make shit work. There are no classes on how to invade and occupy and pacify an Arab country. Know why? Nobody’s ever been stupid enough to attempt it.
There are, however, many authoritative books written on how to balance a budget, secure an airport, rebuild a city, guard a border, and other such remedial tasks which are apparently too pedestrian and not quite romantic enough for our government, which is dangerously taken with delusions of grandeur and neglect of duty.
not exist. The task of American governance has, slowly but surely over the course of sixty years, morphed from “make sure Alabama has schools” to “make sure Seoul has anti-aircraft missiles”. This is not to say that Seoul should not have anti-aircraft missiles; it is simply to say that Alabama used to be closer to Washington, D.C. than Seoul.
I am a republican, miniscule fucking “r”. By republican, I mean believer in the republic. I am disposed of the increasingly unpopular delusion that the American government is supposed to govern America. I pride myself in not having absurdly naïve expectations of our government. I don’t expect my government to mediate the politics of Baghdad, especially when considering the fact that Iraqis simply refuse to speak American; I do, however, expect my government to do run of the mill things such as…oh….preventing tens of millions of anonymous and illegal immigrants from flooding our nation. Or, perhaps, rebuilding New Orleans after it suffered more physical damage than Hiroshima.
I don’t want a president that can bring peace to Iraq. A president that could bring peace to Iraq would be like a president that could eradicate lust from the hearts of men or beauty from the face of children; these are impossible tasks. I want a president that can make shit work. There are no classes on how to invade and occupy and pacify an Arab country. Know why? Nobody’s ever been stupid enough to attempt it.
There are, however, many authoritative books written on how to balance a budget, secure an airport, rebuild a city, guard a border, and other such remedial tasks which are apparently too pedestrian and not quite romantic enough for our government, which is dangerously taken with delusions of grandeur and neglect of duty.
1 comment:
Yo you know I own patent on the Make Shit Work button. It's as resilient as the Cheez-It attached to a Bandaid to form antennae. And far more constructive than us destroying a CD player cause it ate my John Prine CD. Like Pinocchio, we busted that whale open and showed it for the whore it is (was?).
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